Let’s Make a Blank

Fr. Michael Woods called me on Sunday. He was still buzzing with excitement about the All Saints Adult Social that was held on Friday night. He said that I did exactly what I promised to do in our planning meetings and practice sessions: use the basic rules of improv to make the others on stage look good. I managed to get in a few jokes of my own by merely reacting to the silliness around me.

All Saints Adult Social 2013 - Let's Make a Newly Match All Saints Adult Social 2013 - Let's Make a Newly Match All Saints Adult Social 2013 - Let's Make a Newly Match All Saints Adult Social 2013 - Let's Make a Newly Match

Kristin Farley and Rick Russo were celebrity panelists along with Fr. Michael, Fr. Miguel Velez, Fr. John Appiah and Fr. David Carter. Two randomly chosen contestants tried to match the panelists’ answers in an effort to win an iPad Mini. I wrote ten questions, which my wife transcribed onto index cards and sealed in envelopes. Actually I only wrote nine. My wife wrote a question about Fr. David’s cassock. The six questions that the contestants chose were:

Dolly Parton supports the All Saints Adult Social. In fact, she bought four tickets! One for herself, one for her husband and two for her BLANK
.
Kristin Farley has an important job at WATE. It’s called waiting for Lori Tucker to BLANK
.
Father Michael’s homilies are so long (how long are they?) They are almost as long as BLANK
.
Did you hear about the nun who got stranded on a desert island? She used her habit as a BLANK
.
Old Aunt Gertrude gets confused. When they passed her the collection basket, instead of an envelope, she dropped in her BLANK
.
Fr. David Carter is so religious (how religious is he?) He’s so religious that he even wears his cassock to BLANK

Gary Loe played the appropriate game show music every time I said the word “blank.” Here are the four questions that I would have used as tie-breakers, if necessary:

The streets near here always get flooded. Last Sunday I saw someone coming to church in a BLANK

Duck Dynasty is a popular show. But Fr. Miguel thought it was about a bird with a BLANK

When Fr. John Appiah went to Ghana, he tried to tell the people about Honey Boo Boo. They thought he was talking about a BLANK

Rick Russo is a cancer survivor. He told the doctors, You can take my kidney just keep your hands off my BLANK

In another part of the show, three randomly chosen contestants won prizes hidden in big boxes that were assembled and decorated by Ida Randall and her planning committee (which included her husband and daughter). One man won a Dollywood getaway. A woman won a high-definition TV. A third woman thought she had only won a set of barbecue utensils until they wheeled out her brand new gas grill. My wife excitedly said to the person next to her, “It’s just like on the show!”

My friend and pastor also sent me a hand-written thank-you note. Fr. Michael wrote, “You did an awesome job on the evening itself but your interest, insights, suggestions and genuine support of All Saints is priceless. Now that we ‘have it down,’ a rerun might be the ticket!”

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